20 Comments
User's avatar
Jeff Darnell's avatar

Nice tribute. Sounds like you can take the American out of the country but you can’t take the country out of the American.

And you’re right about Americans being kind when you get them one on one, they are very friendly. It’s when they are in a bunch things get tricky!

Expand full comment
Dionne Dumitru's avatar

Your list was spot on, and funny. Some other distinctly American things I appreciate:

Music: jazz, the blues, R&B, hip-hop, rap.

Regional foods: Tex-Mex, Southwestern cuisine, Cajun.

Public observatories and park systems: Starting with Teddy Roosevelt, the country once committed to open its awe-inspiring landscapes and big skies to everyone.

Not coincidentally, the peoples who gave the world these gifts are now targeted. Today is bittersweet. Emphasis on the first two syllables.

Thanks for the essay.

Expand full comment
beckya57's avatar

Love your list.

Expand full comment
John A's avatar

Genius. Your writing is fantastic. Engaging and deep, without an overlay of academic jargon. 😊

Expand full comment
Kat Adams's avatar

Excellent piece Brian! It is a true picture of how uneducated and propaganda-filled Americans are. Not all but at least 49%. If more would travel and broaden their minds maybe just maybe things can change. I also believe it is a very self centered culture. Me first.

Yes some people will help you if needed but then they will expect something back. I’m married to a British man who doesn’t celebrate the 4th and is daily mystified by our culture. I am a Californian and frankly I am too .

Expand full comment
beckya57's avatar

Washingtonian here, same. Often wish I could move to Canada, I feel much more at home there. Brian, another great column. I was alternately laughing and cringing.

Expand full comment
Robot Bender's avatar

I agree, Kat. I was raised in the Caribbean and in the process learned how to speak Spanish. It was a great formative experience. The current war on Latinos breaks my heart. They are such warm, welcoming people if just approached with respect and friendliness.

Expand full comment
Laurel's avatar

To see the European equivalent of Florida man, visit a Spanish holiday resort full of Brits in high season.

Expand full comment
Rea T's avatar

When my daughter's girlfriend visited from the UK one of the things she wanted to do was visit a gun store just for the experience. They also drove across South Dakota, which I am pretty sure blew her mind a little. One thing she couldn't get over was the size of our refrigerator. As refrigerators go, ours is by no means the largest, it's probably on the smaller end of the 'average' scale. This raises the question in my mind of how, exactly, Brits manage to fit groceries and leftovers in their tiny refrigerators. If I ever visit the UK, I am fairly sure that my version of visiting a gun range will be visiting an appliance store.

Expand full comment
Mark Siwik's avatar

Still laughing about our need to find the perfect parking spot - especially at the gym!

Expand full comment
Andrea's avatar

Here in sunny South Carolina, the race is to find the only parking spot that's under a shady tree. Good luck with that!

Expand full comment
David Walker's avatar

What a great tribute to Americana for July 4th; thank you, Brian. I also have your book, “Fluke,” which I brought back with me recently.

I’m also an expat—I live in a small village in southern France—but grew up in the Midwest (South Dakota, Nebraska, and Colorado) and have been fortunate enough to visit all 50 states, the consequence of having travel-loving parents of quite modest means, but somehow we always managed to take off in the Family Truckster for 6-8 weeks every summer (my father was a college prof so he got the summers off) and head off to all corners of the country, but often Minnesota (Ely; Bemidji) for a weeks-long fishing fix.

Your list had me in stitches. In no particular order, here’s a few of my observations as a former Cornhusker fan now living in France.

—Business dealings in the US are typically pretty tight, easy, and time-limited: Everyone’s in a hurry, for whatever reason(s). Here in France, you better get used to shop owners and contractors who will spend a half-hour explaining what they’re selling or how they’re going to fix your garage door before ever expecting you to commit, let alone pay. And we’ve long since learned that you don’t plan more than one major activity in a day because if you plan two or more activities you’re likely to be either late or miss the later event(s) entirely. It can be frustrating at first as a high-speed American, but once you get used to it things just roll along nicely and the world is pleasant.

—You mentioned Kraft Mac & Cheese, which I, too, survived on during destitute college days. Annie’s was even better; 17 cents (!) on sale from time to time. France has somewhere between 1200 and 1600 different types of cheeses, and for some strange reason Velveeta is not on the list. We’ve made it our lifetime goal to try all 1600 different types of cheeses here…just because. Not to knock Velveeta in any way; it’s really handy for mashing a small ball on the end of your fishing hook for luring crappies.

—France has some amazingly tasty strawberries. America has these little red baubles that come in a plastic container that kinda remind you of strawberries but don’t taste like anything; a triumph of American genetic engineering to make them shippable and avoid spoilage for two weeks, but now that we’ve tried real strawberries I’m compelled to ask, “Why bother?” The downside is, you usually have to eat them here within a day or two as that’s as long as they last.

—Bread (including the eponymous baguette) is meant to be eaten the same day it’s baked. Got a problem with that?

—I grew up eating Mexican and Tex-Mex foods since both my parents grew up in Tucson. One of the few things I still crave and have to bring with us when we visit the US is Tucson Tamale’s hot sauce variety pack, as there’s nothing comparable here. Fair warning: A drop of their Habanero sauce would probably be fatal to the average French person.

—People here are also very friendly and helpful—reminds me of my Midwest roots, actually—without having to worry about someone packing heat. And, yes, I’ve been to a few gun ranges in my life. One of the reasons I moved here is that I’ve had two friends murdered by gun-wielding wackos in the US. I never fear being out in public here, at any hour of the day or night. That’s worth a lot in my book.

Thanks again, and a happy, safe 4th to all.

Expand full comment
Makismom's avatar

Fantastic! Thank you. My daughter is living in the UK right now and says she will never take garbage disposals or clothes dryers for granted ever again!

Expand full comment
Katie's avatar

Thanks for your apt Independence Day essay - apt in the sense that in some nations you'd not have the right to write anything critical of the nation, its people, and certainly its government. This Independence Day I hope we Americans will count the blessings that flow from our form of government: a constitutional, representative democracy; governed by the rule of law, not by an arbitrary, self-interested king-wannabe. Those blessings are increasingly threatened and may be slowly (quickly?) extinguished if we don't recognize them and defend them. As Joni Mitchell sang, "Don't it always seem to go that you don't know what you've got 'til it's gone." In our case, it's not "paradise" that will be paved under, but our constitution that will be shredded.

Expand full comment
Lisa Gottschalk's avatar

Delicious post (hear hear to the list of America specific attributes.)

Expand full comment
KN in NC's avatar

The only time I’ve ever shot a gun was in England, as part of a corporate team building in the Cotswolds for some reason. We rode pilot bikes and shot clay pigeons (a much more civilized name than “skeet” at home). Come to think of it, much of Britain feels more civilized. But as you point out, not the laundry equipment!

More Americans should spend more (or any) time abroad. It broadens the perspective greatly. (Not sure the rest of the world wants Joe Gunrange to visit, but that’s a different story).

Thanks for another great piece!

Expand full comment
J. M. Mikkalsson's avatar

Odd that I've never felt I belonged to this American culture.

From an AI Google search: recent polling data, particularly from Gallup: while a majority of Americans continue to express some level of pride in their country, the percentage of those who are "extremely proud" has reached near-record lows. This decline is significantly influenced by generational differences, with younger Americans less likely to express strong pride, and a widening partisan gap, with Democrats showing a notable decrease in national pride.

Expand full comment
Lonni Skrentner's avatar

I agree with those commenters who ask Americans to travel more. We have been so sure that we are "the best" that many don't want to go look. Of course, now the growing wealth inequality makes travel for many impossible.

Expand full comment
Tom Secor's avatar

My Newcastle mate would concur regarding baseball, but as an American mutt —

I’m with you 🤝

#LetsGoOs

Expand full comment